A while ago, in my COVID internet scrolling cycle, I came across an analogy – We often take harm and hurt from unkind words that call us names or try to tell us who we are. In those moments, think of rocks and sticks – someone that yells at a rock to hurt its feelings will never make the rock feel bad. It is quite sure that it is a rock and will only ever be a rock.

A tad over-explained and poorly paraphrased by me, I’m sure. But the TL;DR version would be – Know who you are and it won’t let anything anyone else says to the contrary hurt you.

Well, we’re neither rocks nor sticks.

The belief of rocks and sticks in their own being, I am sad to say, is not the same found in us human beings. We are often found crumbling, and a snide comment about us can be enough to send our inner Jenga blocks falling to the ground as some truly nasty people celebrate seeing us lying in the wreck I’m sure.

We aren’t designed to take on every blow and not see the welts they leave. And some painful words linger, long after the mouths that spoke them have forgotten. Those are the ones etched in the inside of our skulls. The ones that, every now and then, keep us up at night before we finally figure out how to leave them in the past where they belong.

When it comes to self-assurance; to being conscious of your efforts to change; building self confidence – there is no autopilot. No system that will let your mind wander as it safely guides you through.

We are left with a singular tool, albeit a powerful one – belief.

Everytime the world lashes out to try and put you in your place, believe in your efforts to be better and grow in meaningful ways. Let your inner growth outshine the outer criticisms that arise from the crowds. And again, there is no autopilot when it comes to belief. You cannot say, “I believe” and never think about it again.

Believing in yourself must happen again and again. A conscious effort that offsets you from all the hurt and pain coming your way. A wall that shields you. A Patronus, if you will. And once you become good at knowing who you are, at recognizing and honoring your self – you will find that you haven’t become a rock or a stick that cannot be hurt. No, you will instead be a conscious being that sees. Truly sees.

Sees the path ahead, leading out, into the light.

In believing in yourself, there is a world out there – yet to be shaped but right there at the horizon. Waiting for you to come claim it as your own. A world comprising of the right people around you, a good mindset to hold you, belief in your self like gas in the tank, and hopefully rocks and sticks in your garden to remind you that you are quite different from them.

They have their own journeys, I am sure!